Born to Donald and Tonja Owens…Adam Ryan Owens…6/3/75…9 pounds!  

My eldest, my heart…you have struggled and overcome.  You have the kindest soul and a genuine love for those who are suffering.  You help these people everyday with courage and wisdom and compassion.  This mother’s heart overflows with happiness.  I am so proud of you.  What a fine husband you are, a loving father to Levi, and a blessing to all of us in the family.  I love you.  Happy 40 th!

There are wonderful mothers in most families,,,mine included.  These are the women who help lay the groundwork for the way you were raised.   Much of what you and your grandchildren are taught to respect and hold dear, comes from the mothers who have moved on to another place.  I can joyfully say these women who have physically left this earth are in heaven and waiting for me to join them there.  How blessed I am to come from such a legacy.  Here then is a gathering of the mothers who helped shape me.

My mother’s mother…Annie Mariah Tew Merritt….when I was just a baby…

Here she is a few years before she passed away…Granny Merritt…

Here is the sweet mother of my Daddy…  Ester Lillian Hallman Townsend…..Granny T…

And this is a picture of Don’s Daddy’s mother…she passed early in our marriage…Ola Owens…

Sitting with my young boys is my mother in law and Don’s mother Sarah Elizabeth Meadows Owens…..

Elizabeth Owens…she was a kind and gentle soul who loved her Lord and her family greatly…..

Here is my mother a day after I was born…Elosise Merritt Townsend….

With me, ready for church….

With her grandchildren, Ian,Lori, Alex, Adam, Tara, who learned and loved so much from her…

With Joy and I on one of our fun trips together…

My beautiful mother, whom I miss every day….

Joy and I holding our precious grandsons….Levi Hampton Owens, and John Thomas Bush

My Sister, with her children…Joy Annette Townsend McKibben with Lori and Tara

Me, with my children…Tonja Lynn Townsend Owens…with Alex, Ian, Adam…

And the next generation….Tara Suzanne McKibben Bush with John Thomas

Suzanne Michelle Horne Owens with Levi…

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!

What a whirlwind my life has been the past few days.  On Tuesday night, I got a call that our dear Aunt Marie Pope had passed away.  She was in the hospital originally for bronchitis, but then the kidneys and her heart became involved.  She passed without too much suffering…and I rejoice to say she had secured her place in Heaven long ago!

Joy, Pop and I made plans to fly up as soon as we got the details.  So very early Thursday morning, we boarded a flight from Dothan to Raleigh.  Ian was going too, so he flew from Birmingham to Atlanta, and met us there.  Then we flew on to Raleigh, where Ian had rented us a car.  We drove about an hour to get to Clinton.  The visitation was that night, so we had flowers to pick out and other business to take care of.  But, we were ready and at the funeral home at 6:00.  It was a sad time, because the whole family loved Aunt Marie so dearly, but it was a wonderful blessing to see so many of my family who I had not seen in years.

We were pretty tired so we went back to the motel and got some sleep.  But up early the next morning to get ready for funeral.  We left a little early…Pop wanted to visit the cemetery where some of the people he served in the Navy with and their family are buried.  Then we went to the Rowan Church cemetery where my Grandparents are buried…and where Mom and Pop were married….in the church, not the cemetery.

The ladies of the Epwoth Methodist Church had prepared a wonderful meal for us at the church prior to the funeral.  Amazing food.  While we waited for the funeral to begin, we took the opportunity to make pictures of as many family groups as we could.

….Cheryl, Uncle Elwood Merritt, Aunt Betty, Debbie  (missing son,Woody)…this is Mother’s brother

….Tony, Jeannie, Kay, Kim (Warren family…my mother’s sister Della Mae, and Uncle Jefferson…both deceased)

….Uncle Charles Pearson, Aunt Evelyn, Uncle Elwood, Aunt Betty, Pop

Jennifer Pope (married to DeLeon, Aunt Marie’s grandson) and Charlotte Pope (Aunt Marie’s daughter-in law, married to Harry, deceased)

…DeLeon Pope, son of Harry, grandson of Aunt Marie) Lisa Pearson (daughter of Charles and Evelyn)  Ian Owens ( son of Tonja)

….Lori Pearson (daughter in law of Evelyn) Aunt Evelyn Pearson ( Mother’s sister)

….Uncle Elwood and Pop

….Ian, Clyde Townsend, and Nicholas Pope (son of Harry and grandson of Aunt Marie)

Tonja Owens and Ian Owens

….Group picture of cousins, (first and second…Missing Chris who was a pallbearer)

We then attended the service, which was beautiful.  It included a heartfelt letter written to her by her grandson, DeLeon, beautiful music, words by the pastors.  We were all reminded again just how special Aunt Marie was to all of us.  She loved and cared for everyone in her path.  So many people loved her, as was evidenced by the packed church.  This is a country church and the cemetery was right across the road.  We walked over, in bitter cold and wind, to hear scripture and prayers by the pastor.  But, quickly, we hurried back over to the church fellowship all to greet friends.

Someone sat down at a table, and slowly…it filled up as more and more of the family pulled up chairs.  What a beautiful picture of ‘family’…expanding and letting others in…and closing the gap when one moves on.  Thanks, Ian for capturing this.

We left the church and all gathered at Aunt Marie’s house.  This little cottage has been her home ever since she was married at 15 years of age.  It has changed little over the years.  It’s tiny…with a small kitchen and 2 bedrooms, one bath.  Amazing the food that could come out of that kitchen!  Food fit for royalty.  And, she had always just cooked something anytime you may happen by.  She could move like a magician there.  Stove in front…sink in back, one of those old long porcelain sinks with the drain slabs built into each side.  She could stand there and reach almost anything she needed and never leave her spot!

I must say, walking into to her house…even though it was full of family…was a cold feeling.  For no matter how many people were filling up her tiny kitchen and den…she would leave where she was and go and greet them and tell them to come and get something to eat!  The light was not there anymore…the warmth…the “Shug, don’t you want something to eat…I know you’re hungry?”   Some of us sat in her living room..a very unusual thing.  It was for show…not visiting.  But we had to split up due to the number of folks there.  We reminisced about the dining table…how it used to look so big!  And how we as children only got fed after the adults were finished.  Oh, and memories poured.  Then we began getting reacquainted with one another and catching up on each other’s lives and children.  It had been a very long time since I had seen them.  They of course see each other more often as they all live fairly close…but Joy and I had lots to hear about!  More pics, too…

all the first cousins minus Tony and Woody…at least we got Chris in this one!

….Chris and Lisa, brother and sister, and Chris’s wife, Lori 

And, we hugged and cried and said our goodbyes.  And, walked out into the the cold night air to go back to our motel.  We had an early flight…and a long ride to the airport.

All in all for the Townsend family, our trip to Clinton and back took exactly 60 hours.  But, oh, the tears, and joys, and hugs that were crammed into them!

A beautiful wreath of fresh flowers on Aunt Marie’s front door gave passerby’s the information that someone very special lived here.  But, almost everybody that traveled highway 701 knew the Popes!

We walked around her little house earlier in the day and remembered.

This was, for Joy and I, the place we learned that there was a different way of life that the one we lived in Dothan, AL.  This is where we learned about getting up too early, and going to ‘work’ with Uncle Arthur Lee.  We’d ride to the store and get a pack of ‘nabs’ and a mountain dew…and call it breakfast!  (If mother only knew!)  Then we drove all over the area to pick up the ‘hands’.  Back to the field to pick tobacco, or hang tobacco, or stack tobacco,  (Probably don’t have those terms right)  Then we had to go and check other barns to see of there were any problems with them.  And, when we were older, he put us to work to do some of those things ourselves.  Don’t remember that that lasted too long, though!  So, we just rode all morning…called it working…and got filthy!  But, it was nothing short of wonderful!  And, so different from the life we lived in Dothan.  Granny Merritt and Aunt Marie would start cooking when we left before day.  Getting lunch ready!  And, it was a feast, let me tell you!  Harry and Uncle Arthur and maybe one or two others would eat an enormous amount of food…then relax and watch All My Children…and back out to do it all again.  Joy and I tended to stay home for the afternoon!  We learned about combines and tobacco pickers, and tractors in general.  We learned about people who work the land for a living.

….Marie, Della, Eloise, Evelyn

….Grandmother and Grandaddy Merritt at home in Wilmington

….Aunt Marie and Eloise

We went to Vacation Bible School in the same church Aunt Marie was buried in .  We went to church on Sunday.  And, when we weren’t in the fields or eating…there were always beans to snap, or peas to shell or corn to shuck or some unknown food source to be dealt with.  Didn’t mind the shelling…didn’t ike the picking!  And, always…ALWAYS…lots of family dropping in several times a day!  It was a time of playing with cousins, learning from my grandmother, and Aunt Marie, and visiting with the Warrens and Pearsons, and Merritts ,as well!  Little community stores dotted the road…with delightful offerings for a hot, thirsty child. And, there were always chickens…millions of chickens at the Warrens, and goats and pigs…BIG pigs…along with cows and donkeys.  We would usually move around a little to see everyone a while.  It was an idyllic part of our childhood.

So many memories in those yards  between Aunt Marie’s house and Granny Merritt’s trailer, and up the road and down the road.

But, yesterday…the trailer is gone…only the steps remain…and the little house where Granny stored some outside things.  No one lives there anymore.  The birds are not in the trees, because the bird feeders are empty and gone and the flower gardens are not dug up and spaced around so nicely. This land has long since finished being dug up, planted, swept up, lived on by our Granny.

But something is coming to life there.  Something is budding out and getting ready to enjoy the bright wonderful world.  Planted by loving hands…long stilled…but growing and blooming still and bringing beauty to an empty yard full of dead leaves and grass.  Just as our memories bring beauty to our hearts when we remember.

And, even though Aunt Marie’s house is still and quiet…there is the love and care we felt from her oozing out every window and door!  We will never drive past her house without feeling it and remembering how great it was to be loved by her.

And, just look at THIS house…in her front yard tree awaiting a new family who will sing the songs of joy to the Father that she used to sing.  How fitting!

And, a few pictures from several years ago of all the brothers and sisters together before some of them moved to Heaven.

….These following were made in Dothan, 9/8/07

….Harry,( Aunt Marie’s son, deceased), Tonja, Lisa, Joy

Rest in Peace, Aunt Marie.  We are all better people for having known you,  better for having learned from you, and better for being loved by you.  You remain forever in our hearts.

1/22/15

Those of you who follow my blog or who know me personally, know the issues of our middle son, Alex.  He has a degenerative brain disorder called Cerebellar Atrophy.  It affects his vision, his balance, his motor skills…and causes him severe pain daily.   It does not affect his mind in anyway, thank God!  When I say that he is never without pain…it is not an exaggeration.

For years, ever since he was diagnosed when he was in the eighth grade, we have sought help from anywhere and everywhere.  The trouble is, there’s just not a lot of information, and fewer doctors who specialize in this.  We have looked the world over…literally.  We have gotten the most help from the University of Michigan and they have been able to give us information, but no help in dealing with the pain.

Alex is a regular patient of the Pain Management Center here and is on quite a few medications.  And, that is where we have been for about 10 years.  A few months ago, his doctor told him about a new treatment that could possible give him some relief.  He began looking into it and trying to get it available in Dothan.  However, we told him we would go wherever it was available.    The procedure is done every 4 days, so it really needs to be done as close to home as possible.  Finally, it was approved for him to get the equipment here in Dothan.   Then came a whole mess with insurance coverage, etc…since it is still considered by some to be experimental.  Another month or so and that was finally worked out.  We told them we would cover it out of pocket if insurance wouldn’t cooperate.  But, finally it was all set up.  And the device was implanted behind his ear last Thursday.

********The P-STIM is a miniaturized device designed to administer auriculo (ear) point stimulation treatment over several days.   Stimulation is performed by electrical pulses emitted through selectively positioned needles.  The advantage of using the ear is that it offers numerous points of stimulation within a small area.  It provides continuous point stimulation for several days and then is removed and replaced with another.********

I share this with you to ask for your prayers.  Regardless of the efficacy of the treatment, ultimately Alex’s well being is in the hands of our Heavenly Father.  I truly believe God wants Alex to have a better quality of life.  After all, He wants us all to have the joy that only He can give.  We know the outcome of this procedure is up to Him.  Our prayer is that it would give him some relief.  Our prayer is that Alex could be completely healed.  Our prayer is that he could live a normal life and get out into the world and not be home bound.  And, we know God is able.  God is able to do more than we could ever imagine.  Our prayer is that He shows us grace and mercy in Alex’s life.

But, if He should choose to let things remain as they are…we will still praise Him.  He is good…all the time.  And, He sees farther along than we ever could.  His will may be to teach us all a lesson in accepting what we cannot change and learning to look for the blessings of each day.

Pray with us, if you will, that God will give us the grace to accept His decisions…and the strength and perseverance to continue the fight.

1/26/15…..Edited to add:   Today Alex went in to have the second device implanted.  No news yet on if it is working,   Even the doctors and reps don’t know how long it will take to see results.  But, my God is big!

Yesterday, 1/14/15, I had a doctor’s appointment and Levi was going to stay with his Pa at work.  I had some time to kill before I could drop him off,  and I was already on that side of town, so I decided to go by and visit my Mom at the cemetery.  As I pulled in…

Levi…“What is this place?  I never been here before!”

Lulu….“I’m going to show you something.”

And, then I realized that Levi had probably never been to a cemetery before.  Oh, my!  How was I going to explain this to him?  I sent up a prayer…“Please, Lord, give me the right words.”  I did not want it to be a frightening thing for him…but just a fact of life.

We drove past the entrance and into the winding lane between the graves.

Levi….”Oh, I know what this place is!  It’s a flower garden!”

And, looking out over the neatly manicured lawn with flowers springing up everywhere…it did look like a flower garden!

Lulu…“There are sure lots of flowers here, aren’t there?”  And, I kept driving until I got close to Mom’s grave.  I parked and we got out.   He immediately took off running and exploring this new place.

Levi…“Look, Lulu!  There’s flowers and rocks in the ground!”  (He was referring to the headstones that are flat to the ground.)

Lulu…“Come with me, I want to show you something.”  And, I took him over to Mom’s grave.  I showed him the tree we had planted there, and the little redbirds that hang from the branches.  I showed him the bench we had placed there to sit and rest.

Lulu…“This is where My Mommy rests, but she lives in Heaven.”

Levi…“Where is Heaven?”

Lulu…“I’m not really sure, but I think it is on the other side of the sky.  But, I know for sure that Jesus lives there. “

Levi…“Does she have a house?”

Lulu…“The Bible says that she will have a house there.  And, the best part is, God is there, too!”

As he took all this in, he noticed the mausoleum close by.

Levi…“Is that God’s house?”

Lulu…“No.  That’s not His house.”

This was really a lot for a little boy to take in.  So, I just sat and let him ask what he needed to know.

Lulu…“Look, here is my Mommy’s name.”

Levi…” What is her name?”

Lulu…“Her name is Eloise…but your daddy called her Granny. Some people called her Ella, or Miss Ellie, or Annie.  I called Mama.”

Levi…“Is that her rock?”

Lulu…“Yes, that’s her rock.  See!  We put flowers right in here.  See how close it is to the redbird tree.”

Levi…Look! her name has an ‘L’ in it, too!

Lulu…Yes, and look!  it has an ‘E’ and an ‘I’ in it, too!

As he ran around, he picked out letters in other names on the ‘rocks’.

Levi…“Are they all your Granny’s name?”

Lulu…”No. Those are names of other people who are resting here, too.

Levi…“Did they go live with God, too?”

Lulu…“I don’t know, Levi.  But, if they loved Jesus in their heart, they sure did!”

I sat down on the bench and he climbed up beside me…swinging his little legs and looking around.  I knew his mind was full of questions.

Levi…“I like this flower garden.  I think it is a happy place.

Lulu…“Oh, it is a very happy place!  I like to come here.  But, we’ve got to go now…it’s very cold.”

Levi….“Is your Mommy cold, too?”

Lulu…“Oh, No!  She is in heaven…and she is singing and dancing and having a great time.  She doesn’t get tired and she doesn’t get sick….and she doesn’t get cold.  She’s happy all the time.”

Levi…“Can we come back next time?”

Lulu…“Of course we can!”

Wow!  What an amazing exchange!  I think God gave him a little understanding and me words to say.

1/15/15

This morning, before breakfast, Levi said the blessing.

Levi…“God, please look after Lulu’s Granny in heaven.  I like her flower garden.  I will come see her one day.  I like the eggs and the bacon.  I like my school. I like Jesus.  Amen.”

Friends, these are the moments that you take and tuck into your heart of hearts.  These are the moments that remind you that God cares about the hearts of little boys and big Lulus.  These are the moments that remind us that He watches us everyday, in everything we do.  And, He plans special moments for us to savor.

It has always saddened me a little that Mom never got to know John Thomas and Levi, and now Jackson.  She loved her grandchildren so much and her great grands would have thrilled her!  Joy takes John Thomas to visit quite often and now Levi has visited her resting place.  I don’t know if she sees them or knows of them, but I sure like to think that she enjoys it when they visit her.

This little visit to The Flower Garden was a spur of the moment idea…not planned or even thought about until it happened.  Well...I didn’t plan it.  But, perhaps God had other ideas!

It is important that in matters of theology we don’t give more information than a child is old enough to comprehend.  I gave Levi as much information as I thought would make sense to him and I answered every question he asked, but I did not try to explain to him that her body is under the ground, or that she is dead.   That can be quite confusing to a young child.  and that understanding will come to him at a later time.  So, I followed his lead.  What he needed to now…he asked.  What he asked…I answered.  The main thing this little visit did for Levi was show him that a cemetery is not a scary place.  This sets a foundation for the times he will encounter death in years to come.  To him, at this time, a cemetery is a place where there are lots of flowers…it’s a place where we talk about people we don’t see anymore…and, he had a happy time there. 

”  We will tell the next generation the praiseworthy deeds of the

Lord, His power, and the wonders He has done…

so the next generation will know them,

even the children yet to be born,

and they in turn will tell their children.”  

Psalm 78:4-6