“Mommy, please, PLEASE, can I go swimming?  It’s so hot, and Lulu’s already in the pool.  PLEASE ?”

“I think that’s a great idea, Levi!”  “Here you go Lulu!”

“AHHHH!  This is great.  I love to float! “

And all the children and the Mommies, and the Aunts, and the Uncle, and the Lulu got into the pool to play.  Pop and Gigi watched from the side.

Well, it seems that all eyes are on Little Levi !

“Hello!  Are y’all forgetting about someone…waaaay over here…..all alone ?”

“I just don’t understand it, Finn.  They used to all watch ME !  And, now all they do is play with that baby .  It’s not right, I tell you…I was FIRST!!!”

“What’s that?  Do what?  You did that with Alex and YOU got to be the leader?  Yeah!  that’s what I want…to be the leader!  Thanks, Finn !”

“Yeah !!! This is more like it !  Who’s riding high, now?  Uncle Alex,  don’t I look great up here ?   Finn, who? “

And they all played and swam with the smart and cunning John Thomas at the helm.

“Hey, Levi, Don’t be mad.  When YOU are the BIG BOY, YOU can be the leader!”

“HA ! HA ! HA !…I’m ALWAYS gonna be the BIG BOY!  Don’t tell, Ree.  Shhhhhhhh…”

I love my pool.  I love to be in the water.  I love to be in the water when the sun is beating down.   I love to be in the water, in the sun, when the water is not over my head….or I’m floating on a raft.

So, in light of this fact, I went to the store with the big red target on it and bought myself one of those easy to fold, light weight floats.  I bought the one that was full size and had pretty Hawaiian flowers.  I was set.  Ready for the next time I decided to hit the water and lounge around like a lady of leisure.

Well, Lucy Jane came to visit this week.  When she walked in the door she was holding her new froggy swimming aide…and her matching froggy towel.  She had all intentions of swimming at some point in the 4 hours she was there.

“Can we go swimming right now, Aunt Tonja?  I’ve got my suit in the closet and I can put it on quick.”

“Let me finish up a few things and then we will go.”

“I can go ahead and get ready and then I won’t have to get ready when it’s time to go?”

“Aunt Tonja, where do you want me to put my froggy stuff?”  “Do you want me to put it out by the pool?”

“Aunt Tonja, do we have some toys to put in the pool?”

“Aunt Tonja, did you get a new raft?”  “Want me to open it up?”  “I can blow it up.  I can.  There’s just air on the sides.”

“Aunt Tonja, I sure do love you.”  “And I sure do love to go swimming in your pool.”

And, so, I told her to get ready…and I got ready…and we went outside.  I helped her get her froggy on, and then she said,”You need to go get Alex and Wild Man.” (‘Wild Man’ is what she calls Finn.  Which is much closer to an appropriate name than Finn.  Really.)  So, I got back out and went to knock on Alex’s door and told him we were swimming.  Patty had graciously offered to blow up the sides of the raft for me.

Lucy Jane and I had a few minutes of quiet playing in the pool…and then the Wild Man and his boy set upon us.  Out came Alex and Finn.  Now Alex moves kinda slow, but Finn……..he shoots out the door like a bat out of a very hot place!  I got back out of the pool to help Alex get in.

*****when we built the Creekhouse, and the pool, I fully expected there to be a rail somewhere to steady myself as I entered the pool.  And, I didn’t need one as much as Alex did.  But, someone  decided we did NOT need a rail.  And, so we do not have one.  So, Alex has nothing to hold on to as he is entering the pool.  His balance is such that he has to hold on to something to steady himself all the time,  And going up or down the stairs is even harder.  We should have a rail.  I thought I made that clear as we were building.  I’m sure I have made it clear several times since then.  But, we still have no rail.  Which we need.  Desperately*****

Back to the pool.  Lucy and her froggy suit is in.  Alex is in.  And, I am in.  And, here comes Patty with my float.  It looks so inviting…just what I wanted.  So I begin to pull it over to the shelf so I can get on , when I hear a LOUD SPLASH! We who were going swimming were already in….so where did that splash come from?  You don’t even have to guess do you?

Oh, yes it was Wild Man, hisownself.  The Mighty Finn!  He was coming to swim…so we had better be ready or get out of the way!   He swam all around, but he began to have a desperate look in his eyes.  Where was his boy?  Where was he?  Alex walked over and held him.  Whew!  He was safe now!   But he was struggling, because there was no solid ground here in this pool.  No place where the feet could make contact with a surface, and be still.  No…this stuff kept moving!  So Alex, being the kind soul that he is,  just picked him up and plopped him down on…MY NEW RAFT!!!!!

And, so we gathered around and watched a dog on a float in the middle of the pool and talked to him and oohed and aahed at him like we had all completely lost our ever loving minds!  And, Patty made pictures from the sidelines….she had pretty much lost her mind, as well.

Oh, how Finn felt the adoration and praise that was being heaped upon him by those he loved the most….. he was one proud dog.  He wished those other dogs in the family could see him now! ” Jo Jo,this is the way to do it! —-  Look Charla!  Are you jealous?— What do ya think about this, Jezzabelle?—    Hey Kaki, bet you can’t do this! ” And the feeling was so wonderful, he actually floated off by himself for a minute or two and thought of how grand he looked and how his family was safe and secure as long as he was around!  He stood tall and proud!  Now,  THIS was living!  “Look at me, I’m King of the pool!”

Lost as he was, admiring himself as the best dog ever…He barely heard Mom when she said,” Alex, if that hound tears up my new raft with his toe nails, you are buying me two new rafts.  One to replace this one and one to make me feel better! ” UH! OH!  He knew  she meant it, too.  This may not last too long…..better enjoy it while I can!

And, he stood as tall as he could at the front of the boat.  He was the Master!  He was the Captain!  He was the King!   He would see this family to safety.  He would guard them as they swam.  He would banish all intruders who may encroach upon their watery kingdom.  He would be the !!!!!SPLASH!!!!!, he was back in the water!  Pride had been his downfall.  He was so intent upon his new found leadership, that he stood too close to the edge of the raft.  And when the edge went under, he just floated right on out.

And, Finn, the mighty and the brave, took off swimming.  He swam with all his might!  He knew where the shelf was to get out and he was heading that way…FAST!    “WHEW!”  He made it !  The family was safe, too.  He was tired.  He was waterlogged.  He was sleepy.  And, since he was King of the Pool…he would just make a royal decree…”NAP TIME.”

This is not what my post is about.  But, I just need to say it.  Why, out of all the things they make in this great, big, wonderful world of ours to put medicines in, do they have to use those little packages that have writing on the back and clear ultra-super, heavy-duty, industrial strength plastic on the front?  I don’t expect an answer.  There is no answer.  Then there is the tiniest little slit at the top where you are to align 2 fingers on either side and commence to tear it down…through the afore described plastic….and retrieve your medicine.  And,then, if it will not tear…and trust me, it WILL. NOT. TEAR., you search for the scissors to cut it.  Now this should be an easy task since you have probably 42 pair of scissors in the house.  Are any of them in the room in which you are?  Why, no.  Of course they are not.  When you do find them…you must cut straight down…THROUGH the plastic, BESIDE the pill.  Heaven forbid you manage to accidentally cut into the pill.  Because, NOW what you have is a partially opened hump of plastic, filled with fine green POWDER!.  Why?  Because, even though you can buy the pills with a lovely coating on them, so you do not have to taste the foul things as they slide down your throat, that is not the kind that you have.  And they also make a lovely kind that are actually capsules.  Again, no taste.    They even make some that are teeny in size and are in a similar  type of packaging.  However, it is very easy for you to gently push the tablet from one side to the other and take your teeny little pill with no additional upset…other than what is going on in your tummy which is why you are taking them in the first place.However…these have a well known brand name on them…But, do I have the lovely BRAND NAME medication for ‘lower tummy distress’?  Why, no. No I don’t.  I should, but NO,  I have the knock off, lower price version that says ‘compare to…’.  It is cheaper.  It is HUGE and hard to take. It is nigh unto impossible to get out of the package.   It saves about $1.25 on the box.  Do you think I bought this cheap imitation of the real drug for such a thing as ‘lower tummy distress’?  Well, if you said yes, then you do not know me very well.  Since Alex doesn’t drive, and I did not buy them……I’ll give you 3 guesses who did buy the counterfeit drug.  I’ll give you 3 guesses who thought it was a grand idea to buy this forgery.  I’ll give you 3 guesses who is going to get an envelope with exactly $1.25 in it for Father’s Day from his wife.

Well, sorry, I did go on and on, didn’t I?  I have a tendency to do that when I am very aggravated by something, and it really should not have happened.

I think I’m just going to sign off for now…..I’ve got to start working on opening up the next dose.

By the way, this is what my post is about!

FYI TO MY READERS:  This is the recounting of a recent day, spent in my backyard…with Finn and Lucy Jane.  It will be made into a book for her.  I know it’s a mite on the longish side, but I just had to get it all in.  Enjoy!

Once upon a time there was a funny little dog named Finn.  He lived with a Mom and a Dad and his very own boy, Alex.  The family had lots of friends who came to visit.  But, Finn was happiest when Patty and Little Lucy Jane would come over to play.

One day, in early spring, Finn heard the doorbell ring.  And, soon, he heard a voice he loved…it was Little Lucy Jane!  He started shaking all over with excitement.  He always had such fun when she came to play.  He could remember making turkeys out of pumpkins together, and blowing bubbles together.  Well, she blew the bubbles, he just tried to catch them.  He remembered going to catch the sticks she threw, and chewing on the baseballs she tossed in the yard.  She was a little girl…not a big girl like Mom.  So he had to be careful not to jump on her cause it would make her fall.  He just wanted to give her kisses, but he had to be very careful and just kiss her when she was sitting down.  Oh, he could hardly wait!

He wished Alex would open his door and let him out.  She needed to be greeted properly.   But, he couldn’t reach the door handle…and he couldn’t turn it if he did reach it!   She would be so glad to see him.  Sometimes, she would call him ‘Wild Man’ instead of Finn.  That was OK with him because he knew she loved him.

Finally, Alex opened the door.  He hurried as fast as his short little legs would go.  “Where was she?”  “Where was she?” , he thought.   And, then he saw her.  Well, he was so excited he ran to her and jumped with all his might to give her lots and lots of kisses!  “OW, Finn!”, she said, “that hurt.”  She was rubbing her arm where one of his toenails had scratched her.  OH, he felt so bad.  He felt so sad.  He forgot that she wasn’t big like Mom.  Awww, he was so sorry.  So, he just stood next to her as still as he could be.  Then she bent down to hug him.  And, THEN, he could give her kisses.  He did, and she laughed and laughed and laughed.  He liked to hear her laugh.  It really made him happy. 

Mom suggested that they go outside for a walk around the big, back yard.  That was a great idea!  There were so many things in the yard to see and chase and smell.  Oh, it was a very fine back yard!  They walked a while, and then they ran a while.  They rang the windchimes, and checked the water in the pool.  They sat in the swing and went back and forth, back and forth.  UGH!  He had to get down.  Lucy threw the ball and he chased it.  And she threw it again and he ran and ran and ran.   Right about then, Finn caught a whiff of something wonderful.  What was it?  Little Lucy Jane and Mom didn’t know…they didn’t even smell it!  But, he did.  And, it was wonderful!  And, he was going to find it…and smell it and smell it and smell it!  And, he would share it with Lucy Jane and Mom.

“There it is!  I think it’s down here!”

“Yeah!  Right down there!”

“Lucy Jane, can you smell it?  Can you?”

 “Whew!  This is hard work!  But, I’m getting close.”

“AHHHHHH!  there it is!  It makes me swoon!”

“Lay in it? Are you sure?  Well, OK, then!”

“It’s great!  Don’t you think it’s great?  I think it’s great!  Really, great! Just really great!”

“Here  stick your head in…right here!”

“Now, just roll around in it like this!”

“Told you!  Wasn’t that the best thing ever?”  I’m one happy dog!”

“What?   Dirty? Who’s dirty? Filthy?  What does that mean?   Why are you looking at me like that, Mom?”

“See?  I can wash off right here in the pool…just like Lucy Jane.  Relax, Mom…we’ll be fine.”

“Uh Oh!  Mom’s got that look in her eyes.  Think I’ll hide over here.  Oh no!  She went to get Patty!   Run, Lucy Jane!”

“Aw, man.  This is a bad,bad idea, Mom.  Why do you want to go and ruin my good day?  Hey!  Four hands is way too many!  It doesn’t take four hands to wash me! ”

“Hmmm…I’m kinda liking this smell, too!  Hey, Patty, how about a kiss?”

“Look at me, would you?  I’m clean…I smell like a coconut…and when they let me get down, I’ll shake the rest of this water off.  Why do people think you can dry a dog off with a towel?   We can do it lots better ourselves!”

“Let me down, now….please…I’ve been good!”

And, when the Big Dig and the Shower in the Sun were all finished, Finn was ready to go home with Alex and take a nap!  Which he did.  Oh, he had the best dreams of the most wonderful hole and the most wonderful smells, and the most wonderful friends.  But, NOT the most wonderful bath!

And Mom, and Patty and Lucy Jane, and Alex  talked about the day’s adventure and laughed again.  And, they all looked forward to being all together once again.

                                                                                              THE END

FYI…I do not usually wear headbands with yellow bows on them…unless Lucy Jane brings it to me and asks me to.

O.K….let me be honest with you.  It will help you enjoy this story much better.  I do not like the ocean.    Well, I like to look at it.  I like to sit next to it.  I like to smell it.  I like to hear it.  I like the way it moves.  BUT….I do not like it to touch me……not even one little bit.  I don’t like to be in it because there are other things in there too and I do not know where they are or what they will do or if they like me and want to touch me or if they don’t like me and  don’t choose to ignore my presence.

If there is a time that I NEED to be in the ocean….I can do it.  I used to get in with my children when we would visit the beach for vacations.  One rule:  Mom’s head does NOT go under the water.!!!!!!  They did pretty good, and I went in with them enough to get good marks in the ‘mother of boys’ department.  But since they got to the age where it was akin to public humiliation to be seen with your mother…..no more time in the ocean for me.  Which suits me fine!

Now you know of my love for Maui…I’ve talked about it enough.  But, all the times I’ve been there I have never gotten in the ocean.  Which was causing me no grief  because I never wanted to.  It was enough to be near it and watch it.  Besides I had always heard that you could not trust the currents and tides and such. ..especially there.   Once, while visiting there, I went out to lay in the sun for a while.  I placed my towel and other stuff far enough away from the waves breaking on the shore.  I watched the water for a while and then lay down to soak up some rays.  That was when it was still considered OK to lay out in the sun.   After about 10 minutes, I was surrounded by a foot of ocean water all around me.  All my things were floating away.  Water was everywhere.  It wasn’t a wave…it was the tide.  And, it was coming in fast.  I gathered what I could and high-tailed it (literally) to higher ground.  I learned a quick lesson then….DO NOT TRUST THE OCEAN IN HAWAII!  And, by the time I was ready to drive away…it was about 3 feet deep!  Scary!  And no sign to say BEWARE!  YOU CAN DROWN ON THE SAND!!!!!

ANYWAY…Patty is a swimmer…and a very good swimmer.  And, she loves to be in the water.  So the first chance she got…she was IN the ocean.  I tried not to think about it.  Now Joy likes the water as well, and is a good swimmer.  So the next day, she went with Patty.  And, they got all sorts of pictures of each other in the Maui waters.  They flaunted them in my face.  Really, I was not jealous in the least.  Besides, I had not brought a swim suit. I had no intention of needing one.   No matter….they put in for me to get in the water so we could all have a picture of us in the ocean.    While at a local shopping mall, I was making a purchase, and   when I finished paying, Patty was waiting for me.  She went in several stores and finally found a suit…ON SALE.  I tried it on and it fit.  As well as it could, I suppose.  And, plans were made for me to get into the ocean…just for a picture.  And, being the good sport that I am, I agreed.

Oh, I got a cover up and I got a hat and sunglasses, and I got ready to go.  And, I went.  And therein lies the story. 

I learned long ago, that you should never allow yourself to be talked in to something you are not comfortable with.  Things will not go as planned……bad things will  happen……and happiness will not be the result.  Oh…and you will regret your decision.  But, I digress.

*****BTW*****I’m sure you will understand if this little post doesn’t include many pictures.  Another thing I learned a long time ago…some things are better left unseen !

Just so you will know this is a true story…..here’s evidence!  Yes, I do know it’s quite far away…do you blame me???

Patty and Joy are already on the beach, and they can hardly contain their enjoyment of seeing me in a very uncomfortable place.   They were jumping up and down and turning flips and whooping hollering like little children!   But, I said I was goint to get in and I was!  I placed all my things down and took off my cover up.  Why did I leave my hat on, you say?  Because I had no intention of any harm coming to it…nor of it getting wet.  Because, only the bottom half of me was going to be submerged.  Yeah right!

This picture is taken while I am only in water up to my ankles.  Notice I am still smiling! 

Patty and Joy are on the beach saying, “Go further out!”…  Patty was taking pics and Joy came down to the water.  Anyway, I went out a little ways more.  “Just a little more!” they said.  And, soon I was up to my tummy.  Oh, the water did feel good, too!  And, I was standing there, feeling all Hawaiian Beach Babe , loving on nature, and thinking how proud I was of me.    And, what a great friend and sister I was to indulge my friends this way!  What a delightful little fairy tale I stepped into for a moment.  But, the next place I stepped was not so pleasant!

The undertow was fierce and I could tell I was being pushed and pulled strongly by it.  “Time to put a ‘happily-ever-after’ to this fairy tale…and get on out of here,” I thought.  I knew I was pushing my luck.  So, I took a step toward the shore, and immediately got pushed backward.  I tried to regain my balance, but the ocean floor was not in the same place!  It dropped away…and I could not find a bottom to touch!  So, I started swimming toward shore.  At least it’s what I like to call swimming! :).  I have always known I could swim if I had to and nobody believed me…but they saw that day!

Where, Oh, where was this sign?

Notice that even through this turmoil, I managed to keep my hat on my head.  Patty is still making pictures!!!  I swam up to where I could stand up…but something went horribly wrong.  I just couldn’t stand up.  Joy tried to help me…however she was laughing mighty hard, so she probably wasn’t giving her best effort! 

 I managed to make it to my feet , but somehow I got knocked down by another wave.  And, even though I hate to admit it…this was in 2 feet of water!  Anyway, I ended up on the ocean floor. …completely lying in the surf.     And, the next thing I know…I was being rolled…ROLLED, PEOPLE…3…I tell you…THREE…TIMES!!!!! Everything I had was full of sand.  My mouth, and lungs, and head were full of water…not to mention my eyes and nose!     I was completely disoriented.  AND…I could not get up and out of that water.   And, my hat was gone, too.

I was begging Joy to help me…but, obviously she found this little unfortunate incidence to be a mite funnier than before!    And the only thing I saw of Patty was a camera where her face should be.  OH, yes.  I could tell she was laughing too, even as near to drowning as I was. 

Thankfully, there was a hero on the beach with his wife.  He had the good sense to tell that I was really in trouble and rushed to help me.  He helped me stand up and he walked me onto shore.  I thanked him and thanked him and thanked him again.   His wife and Patty were having themselves a good, old time at my expense.  His wife said to Patty, “I’m sorry to laughing at your friend, but that was the funniest thing I have ever seen!””  OH REALLY?  Then she said, “This should be sent in to Funniest Home Videos!  It would win!”   I started to take that little tanned , skinny girl in a bright white bikini and tell her a thing or two. 

 But, actually…I didn’t have any fight left in me.  I was winded.  I needed to sit down.  I needed to cry.  I needed someone to hug me and say, “Are you sure you are all right?  Is there anything I can get you?  I was so scared for you.  Are you sure you’re OK?”  But, all is heard was laughter…..on either side of me and behind me.  It was not a good day to be in the ocean in Maui…or on the beach, either! 

I learned many lessons that day.

Good friends can turn mean in a hurry!*****So can sisters!*****Never back into the ocean!*****Sometimes people with cameras in their hands don’t have many brains in their head!*****Sometimes people who get their scalp blistered on their first day in Hawaii get their brains blistered as well!*****Never go swimming anywhere that doesn’t have at least one hero close by.*****Don’t count on your family or good friends to be your hero!*****

And, now I post here the two bathing beauties who laughed when they should have been helping!

So, in case any of you are planning a trip to the beautiful islands of Maui, stay out of the ocean.  Especially if you have friends or family with you!!!

Now, all kidding aside.  I really was in trouble in the water.  The undertow was so strong, and the force of the wave churning, coupled with my weak legs could have been a bad situation.  Of course, I would never have been in the ocean alone.  But, it was so deceiving. I would never have thought I could not walk out of an ocean.   Please be careful when you swim.  I truly don’t know what would have happened if I had not had the help of the man on the beach.  Joy was trying to help, but she was not strong enough.  And, Patty would have been there in a second once she realized I was in trouble.  Hawaiian waters are notorious for changing tide patterns and undertows, and riptides and such.  I will enjoy it again….but only from a distance.  No matter what my companions say!

ONE MORE THING…..

Isn’t this the strangest drowning sign you have ever seen?  It was in use for only a short time before being discarded for obvious reasons. 

 Do you see it?  LOL …. is a head with 2 raised arms on either side!

I wonder if Joy and Patty had anything to do with that?